Kansas City Bastards

The Return of the Weekly BOD

by on May.05, 2013, under Blogs, Epic Douchebaggery, Other Magnificent Bastards

ahhh… sweet internet at last. This means I should get to doing this weekly blog again.

Having said that, I am going to nominate myself as this week’s bag of douche since I haven’t written and article in months. I could make every excuse why there hasn’t been one, but that would only make me more douchey. So let’s just do some explaining.

Since my arrival here in the Oh-Pee of Kay-ESS I’ve pretty much just focused on work and drinking with Tim, which really isn’t that bad of a deal, really, but when you are the author of the 7,254,919th most popular blog on the internet (with a BULLET), slaving to the grind looks like you’re shirking your bastardly duties.  I’ve had my own place since October, but I’ve neglected to do certain things like… get cable and internet access.

Not to mention buy normal food and drink, a decent vacuum, and dishes, but that’s a whole other story.

Hell, I’ve gotten divorced and remarried since my last column. Let that sink in.

But I’m back now, and allow me to explain that the time between columns is not the main reason I’ve given myself this distinction, no no. It’s because for the past 8 months there has been an unsecured wifi spot in my apartment building and i’ve been using that to play online games on my PS3 and just now got my computer up and running in order to make columns that make you all raise your fist in unison and chant “YES, THAT PERSON IS IN FACT, A DOUCHEBAG”

And I am that douchebag, for relying on pirated internet to bring joy to the masses.

Which puts me in a predicament. Never before have I watched my neighbors move out without getting this feeling of dread that in the middle of an episode of Walking Dead on netflix, the signal will be killed and i’ll be shut off from the internet forever, or unless I get off my cheap ass and pay for my own cable provider instead of relying on Obamanet.

Congrats Jaye, for being lazy AND cheap,





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